Casual Dating

I done a post a last week covering my first date with my husband to be and I touched a little bit on the dating game. I thought I'd share my opinions and views online dating/casual dating in a little more detail.

I've never been a dater to be honest. I've always concentrated on friendships more than relationships. In my younger days I had a few casual relationships and partners but nothing serious until I met my current partner and husband to be.

I was chatting with a friend last week and she was saying how sick of casual dates she is. We had a laugh and I was trying to brighten things up by giving her the pro's to casual dating.

No commitment
Your own money
Your own plans
The bed to yourself most nights
Freedom to do whatever you want, whenever with whoever

She argued that although that's fun, it does become boring after a while. I later seen her post a quote on Instagram saying ''I'd rather be wine and dined by the same man every night than a different man every week'' and I kind of agreed. There's so much effort required for casual dating. Now, I'm not saying you don't need to make an effort with a long term partner, of course you do! But you don't have the worries of being seen without makeup, the arguments about who washing up or the rows at 3am because they've snored all night every night for the last 3 years and you're so damn tired.

I'm a home girl. I like plans, organisation, commitment, trust, loyalty, routine and security. I don't think you truly have any of those when you're casually dating. So I guess it depends what makes you happy. That's the most important thing isn't it? Don't rush into a relationship if you're not ready. They do say you've gotta kiss a few frogs. It's personal preference and if you want to enjoy yourself, meet new people and experience the excitement of those first few dates on a regular basis then do it! Live it large as they say.

I'm not saying I don't agree with casual dating. I appreciate it's fun, thrilling and exciting but I guess my friend was right, it will get boring and there'll come a time where you stop and think. The effort you put in to impress a man/woman for a few dates, you could use that effort to blossom a beautiful long term relationship. Every relationship takes effort. Lots of it. Constantly. Consistently.

I suppose there's pro's and con's to both. It's never too late and it doesn't matter where you are, whether that be somewhere remote like the Shetlands you can check out Shetland Dating, if you're further south you have Norwich dating and Hereford dating or even if you're at the other end of the country you have Dumfries dating and over 50's dating Fife which is targeted at more mature people. There's always someone who can the tic to your tac, whatever your tac may be.

Maybe casual dating will lead to something more serious and steady? Isn't that what everyone is hoping for? Even the ones who are scared of commitment. They're maybe just scared because they've never experienced it before?

The dating game is tough! And a bit of a mystery. I'm glad I'm no longer a part of it. LOL.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on casual dating vs long term relationships.

This is a sponsored post however all words, opinions and views are my own

50 comments

  1. I am married so dating is out, but I think if both parties are happy to casual date then there really is nothing wrong with it. As long as everyone is safe, why not?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I totally agree, it's completely down to personal preference and if both parties are happy then go for it

      Delete
  2. I've never done casual dating but I can already tell that it sounds like too much effort for something that wont last! I'm more of a commitment kind of girl - in it for the long haul - for the trust, honesty but more importantly I like to grow as a person with my significant other- to go on a journey with them!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm exactly the same. I like commitment and security. I like to share my life with someone and really get to know them

      Delete
  3. I don't think of dating as a casual or big thing. It's just two people getting together and getting to know each other. I think once you label something, that's when issues can arise. Great post.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Very true. Live at let live as they say, as long as people are happy

      Delete
  4. Dating can be hard for some, but it can be good to casually date because until your committed to someone you really get to know yourself. That can be hard for some who jump from relationship to relationship.

    Sondra (Prettyfitfoodie.com)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, I didn't truly know myself until I was in a long term relationship. Only then do you figure out who you really are

      Delete
  5. Casual dating can be fun for the first few dates but then it gets boring as the days drag on. I used to casually date, that was, until I met my husband. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's my thoughts too, it's all fun in the beginning but usually ends with at least one person disappointed

      Delete
  6. I actually have never done a casual dating before - maybe a no commitment, no string attached type of relationship might be fun, but I don't think it will work for me! haha, I'm more of a type who only dives into one person.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm the same. I make a lot of effort and don't think I could do that with multiple people, it wouldn't be fair on them if I wasn't giving it everything

      Delete
  7. You stated the actual facts of being in a casual and in a serious relationship. It's all about the choices, people these days want to be free so they opt for casual dating. But I still prefer a long term serious relationship!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's totally down to personal choices and what it is you're looking for at the time

      Delete
  8. Definitely pros and cons to both but I'd prefer drinking wine every night with the same person haha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha agreed! But if both people are happy then why not I suppose

      Delete
  9. Casual Dating has it purks, however, you have to go into with open eyes. It is too much work, if you ask me. You always have to be in a chipper mood to impress your date. Sometimes, you just want to go out and be yourself and not have to worry about if you have to belch or not.lol Grat post.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Definitely go in with open eyes! I think it's the unexpected and unknown I don't like about it. Wondering what if or becoming too attached I guess

      Delete
  10. I did lots of casual datings before I settled in. Oh well, in my own opinion, everyone should give a try on it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You certainly have to kiss a few frogs first and I've done my fair share of casual relationships, no more thankfully

      Delete
  11. I'm so glad I'm married. The dating world sure seems tough to navigate. Before I met my husband, I did a little casual dating, but always asked what they were looking for long term. I knew I wanted to meet someone and get married, and didn't want to waste either of our time. x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree Alison, it's always best to know exactly what you're getting into as it does time take and effort and it would be a shame to waste it on someone who wanted different things

      Delete
  12. I relate to your post so much! I did the whole casual dating thing for my first two years of college but I soon became tired of it but felt there wasn't any other options. Thankfully I met my current boyfriend through that casual dating scene and now I love the commitment and consistency. I have a snapchat saved from about a year ago that I sent to my best friend that was of me in pajamas and slippers and said "you know you're too comfortable with a guy when you show up ready to go to bed" and honestly I have found that that is when I am happiest. Never having to worry about waking up early to either leave or quickly reapply my make up. I can now go out to a party and go with the guy I am trying to impress (which is so much fun) or stay in and bake brownies and watch a movie and just have fun! Though I have to be thankful for casual dating because it did lead me to him.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sounds so much like my story! I love it. The power of social media and casual dating! I'm glad you found your partner

      Delete
  13. i think at one stage of life you prefer dating game ! but after the passage of and maturity to select and prefer long term relationship

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, I never set out to get married! But here I am, planning a wedding! lol

      Delete
  14. I am also the type of person who likes to settle I guess because I have settled and I absolutely love the man I am with. I do like commitment and the attention and care of the partner so I guess that's the biggest reason. I have a lot of friends who do casual dating but I guess they get tired over time.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Totally agree, the commitment for me is a big deal! It ticks all my boxes

      Delete
  15. I am engaged now but have never been a casual dater and am a long term relationship kinda girl. However people are different so I understand how others like it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Congratulations on the engagement! I agree, it's personal preference and everyone is looking for different things

      Delete
  16. I have never been one for casual dating and I am glad I am no longer in the dating game. Was interesting to read the perspectives here.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm glad I'm no longer in it too! It's such a chore nowadays lol

      Delete
  17. I've grown tired of the whole dating scene now, so have kind of given up looking. Everyone seems to want casual dating and whilst it's exciting it gets boring pretty quickly.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm sure your perfect match is out there somewhere! Maybe taking a break will bring them to you

      Delete
  18. I'm kinda with your friend here - I'd much prefer to be with the same guy for every date, rather than a different guy every week. I've done casual dating, and I don't really enjoy it - it's a lot of effort for something that's never going to go anywhere! x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, it's a total waste of time unless you know exactly what you're getting yourself into

      Delete
  19. I hear you. For me I prefer relationships to casual dating as someone is always going to be more invested than the other in casual dates. I would rather wait a lifetime for the right guy rather than go with people I don't care about x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm the same Ana, I don't do anything half hearted so it would tear me up if I was to be let down continuously x

      Delete
  20. No commitment/Your own money/Your own plans..This is so true!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Casual dating is fun when you have no expectations... Its also a good tool to use when you are trying to get your feet wet again. I didn't mind it at all and after a few friendly casual dates... my husband and I decided to take each other seriously :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think that's a good point.. expect nothing then you can't be disappointed

      Delete
  22. I think for most people casual dating is the first step towards finding a long term partner. Most people thrive in a long lasting relationship and most people are looking for precisely that. Casual dating is grand for a while until you find a partner you would like a relationship with. its also great for helping to recover from heartache from a break up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Very true! I guess most people hope it will blossom into something more stable

      Delete
  23. For me, i don't go on casual dates.. i mean, in my case, I don't ask someone a date if I am not serious about it.. maybe it's just me but I'm a kind of guy who take relationship seriously

    ReplyDelete
  24. in my opinion, casual dates can be interesting if one is not looking for something so serious. Personally, I have no problem with it. If both the parties are ok with it, then I think it should be fine.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Totally agree, if both people know what they're getting into then that's fine

      Delete
  25. I can relate on this. I'd been married for years now, and Its not been me to go for casual dating. I am more of knowing people thru friendship and long time relationship. And I would say, I was able to be with the man I dreamed of :)

    ReplyDelete

Leave a comment