10 Things To Remember When Wedding Planning

Unless you've been hiding under a rock or had no social media for the last 18 months then you'll know I'm planning our wedding! The big day is fast approaching, we still have some time left but it's flying by.

I've loved most of the planning but it can get stressful and become very overwhelming. I thought with setting our date and initially having 3 years to plan the whole swaray, it would be plain sailing and stress free. I was wrong! Wedding planning is a bumpy road, it's about learning to overcome them and move on.
 
Here's the 10 things I've realised since our wedding planning began:

1. You can't please everyone and that's okay. It's a wedding, a time to celebrate the marriage and love for each other with your nearest and dearest. It's not a people pleasing party and others opinions shouldn't matter. As long as you and your soon to be husband/wife are happy, nothing else really matters on the day. We can stress over guest lists and overthink the judgement of others but in the end does that really matter? Not at all. If you want pink candy floss draped off the ceiling then have it, if you don't want to provide entertainment then don't. It's your day, one of the rare times all attention will be on you and you have full control of how the day goes. Make the most of it!

2. You'll know when you find THE ONE. I was dreading wedding dress shopping. I knew the style I had in mind but I was worried about going and actually trying them on. Being a plus size bride to be can be very daunting! I've lost 6 stone during our planning, still more to go but my confidence is growing slowly but surely. I tried a couple of dresses on and liked them. I then tried the final dress and I felt sick with excitement and nerves. I was so emotional and didn't want to take it off. I ordered it there and then and paid the deposit. I see so many people posting in wedding groups on social media asking for opinions and sharing pictures of them in wedding dresses. I don't understand why these brides do this, the opinion of a stranger should not matter. If you feel confident, beautiful and comfortable then why torture yourself by asking for feedback online? Go with your gut. If you feel fabulous if layers of ruffles and a 10 layer underskirt then go for it. It's YOUR wedding dress! You only get one shot and wearing it. Hopefully.

3. The minor things don't really matter. I stressed for months over wedding favours and centrepieces. I spent hours on Pinterest looking for ideas and nothing was jumping out at me. I finally realised that none of these minor things actually mattered. Yes they make the tables look pretty and give a book background for photographs but no one will remember what was in the middle of the table. It's the conversations, atmosphere and excitement that makes memories. Not favours and napkins.

4. You will need a budget. I made the mistake of not setting a budget and just paying/buying things when I seen something I liked. Big mistake! I've spent a small fortune and still have a way to go. I'd highly recommend setting a budget, even if you're not limited to a budget, it's good to have some figures in mind otherwise it can get ridiculous and you'll just spend spend spend! Everything wedding related is pricey and the more you look, the more you find! Pinterest is amazing but very dangerous! There's so many ideas you just NEED on your day. Be wise and have a budget!

5. The guest list is about the people you want to share your day with. Not the people you feel like you have to invite. Unfortunately we couldn't have everyone we hoped at the daytime reception due to numbers and seating arrangements and yes some people have taken huge offence at this but at the end of the day they aren't funding our wedding and we certainly won't lose any sleep about not inviting our old next door neighbours who we haven't seen for 7 years.

6. Don't expect people to be interested in your plans. You'll be mega excitement, maybe even slightly obsessed but others won't feel the same. Yes they'll be happy for you and yes they'll ask how the plans are going from time to time but don't expect people to always be asking and don't expect people to be involved. Even bridesmaids! Luckily my bridesmaids/maid of honour is really helpful and supportive but I've cut 2 others who just weren't! You'll definitely start to question your friendships and realise who's important to you and who/what really matters. You'll be surprised who is and isn't there when you need them most.

7. Book in advance! I had my heart set on a florist, I use them all the time! I approached them 2 years before our wedding date only to find our they were already booked! Same happened with my preferred makeup artist. So definitely remember to book the important bit's (especially the church/registrar) well in advance to avoid disappoint. Leave all the small things like suits and invites until closer to the day. You may think you have ages but you really don't. Good suppliers get snapped up quickly.

8. You will change your mind. ALOT! One month you'll love pastel pinks and the next you'll want something vibrant and funky. Don't rush out buying things to match a particular colour scheme or theme because new trends and ideas will always be catching your eye and it can end up a big fat waste of money if you go out on a whim and buy everything pink and later decide you want yellow with blue stripes! Before making any official and final decisions, make sure you're sure!

9. Don't compare your day or plans to others. We have 7 friends getting married in the same year as us. I'm so excited to be attending all of these weddings because I know each and every one of them will be different and personal to each couple. Make your day special to you and don't compare your day to others. Everyone has different tasted and it's not a competition.

10. Stressing about it won't make it easier! Like I've said before, wedding planning is stressful and overwhelming. If you're getting frustrated with your plans simply take a break! Log out of Pinterest, stop searching for pretty venue décor and forget about bridesmaid dresses for a while. Recharge and go back to your plans with a clear head. You'll feel much better for it and you'll be much more productive.

Most of all remember to have fun with it! We spend so much time and effort in the build up and the day is over with no quickly! Remember to relax and take it all in... hopefully we only get to do this once!

If you've got any top tips or helpful hints for planning a wedding, I'd love to hear about them!

54 comments

  1. Planning a wedding is a bumpy road, indeed. It's important to just plan for the day that you want and not worry about how others will see it. It's your wedding after all.

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    1. Exactly! The one day we can have control and have things how we want it!

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  2. So many congratulations on your upcoming marriage! Yes to realizing you can't please everyone. It's so tough .. but you've got to stand your ground. In a kind .. but firm manner

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    1. Totally agree. Firm but fair, people will still try and interfere but it's important to stand your ground

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  3. While getting married is a dream come true .. wedding planning can certainly have it's ups and downs! What an important thing a budget is. There's always something cute to buy or upgrade .. but if you can stick to a budget your future self will be jumping for joy!

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    1. Yes! Totally agree. It's easy to be sucked into the buying craze isn't it. And pretty hard to resist!

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    2. Your right a budget is needed to restrain ourselves from spending all the money we have. Even a little budget can go a long way x

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  4. Congratulations on the big day ahead. These pointers are great. My fav of all is dont compare your wedding to others. This is really true as it is your day and not anyone else's day

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    1. Thank you for your kind words. Many brides can see other brides as competition, I've never understood why as each day is totally different

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  5. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding, I hope it all comes together in a way that surpasses your expectations. With every wedding I have been to, if the bride and groom are happy and enjoying themselves, then everything will be fantastic!

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    1. Thank you very much! I'm hoping it will be stress me and I'm nice and calm on the day!

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  6. Congratulations on your upcoming big day. I hope all the ups and downs with planning makes it the perfect day.
    Wedding planning is so stressful, my best tips are don't listen to other people's advice and opinions and stick to a budget.

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    1. Thanks very much. Totally agree with your advice. A budget is so important

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  7. First of all congratulantions on your upcoming wedding. Planning a wedding is quite a journey. I remember how I did mine a decade ago, it was quite tough but at the end as you siad the bride and the groom's happiness in that special day is all the matter.

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    1. Thank you Rose! Yes I totally agree, it's important to remember why we're getting married and not let the one day take over, it's the start of a new beginning!

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  8. Thank you for this! I don't have any plans on getting married any time soon (though who knows, right?), but I'll save this for the future! :)

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    1. That's what I said 3 years ago, you just never know!

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  9. Pinterest was a nightmare for me when I was planning my own wedding. There were so many cute options, but I know I couldn't have nor afford them all!

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    1. I know right! The ideas on there are incredible but it definitely boosts up that budget. I've banned myself from it now lol

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    2. I can imagine that Pinterest would absolutely make you spend more money as the options are so varied. Of course we become like kids in a candy store when faced with so many options x

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  10. Really great tips. Number one, you can't please everyone should be a life lesson! So many people get stressed out because they can't make everyone happy. Great points.

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    1. I sooo agree with that. Too many people care what others think. I live to be happy not to make others happy. I try and make people at all times but I'd never sacrifice my own happiness for theirs

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  11. Congratulations and thanks for the tips. I am going to share this article with my friend getting married soon.

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    1. Aw thank you Ravi for your support and kind words. I hope your friend finds this helpful when planning their big day

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  12. I am not going to get married any time soon but I have observed all these behavior patterns of sometimes being hyper excited and sometimes changing your mind frequently in my cousin who tied the knot recently. Wish I could have shown her this article then :)

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    1. It's an emotional rollercoaster, certainly not all flowers and cake and all things pretty lol

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  13. Aw your getting married? Massive congratulations, I can't wait to see your wedding dress and I completely agree with you when you said that other peoples opinions shouldn't matter. If it makes you feel good then why not? x

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    1. Thanks Ana. I'm so excited! 68 weeks to go hehe x

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  14. You can't please everyone is the main advice I would give to anyone. I've had two weddings (different grooms, ha!) and I think I learnt the same from both. When it comes to the guest list particularly, someone will ALWAYS be offended. Just do what makes you happy, it's your day!

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    1. It's hard to please everyone, maybe even impossible! And people seem to take pleasure in being offended. The drama that comes with wedding planning is crazy

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  15. Totally agree with your first point! You can't please everyone and the only people you should be pleasing are you two!

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    1. Thanks Naomi. Once I realised that, wedding planning became much more enjoyable

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  16. Wish I had seen these when we planned our wedding. Most of it went off smoothly but boy, some of it was rough! Great tips!

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    1. It's certainly not all pretty things when wedding planning. It's like a full time job! It takes over

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  17. When planning your wedding, there are things that are nice to know, and then there are things you need to know. These all tips are duly noted. It is really helpful!

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    1. Thanks Dana! Wedding planning is such a hard thing, it's underestimated so I'm glad my tips can help people out

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  18. Congrats on the coming wedding. And I agree with you that people should not stress out over it or no one will be happy, including yourself. Although having a budget is a good thing most definitely. ;-)

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    1. Thank you David. A budget is a life saver! Saves so much stress

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  19. Wedding planning can drive you crazy. It's good to get some help as you can never do it all alone. These are awesome reminders for anyone who's planning a wedding at the moment.

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    1. Thanks Carol. A girl after my own heart... anything to make the planning easier!

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  20. that is a very good list for anyone planning a wedding... Maybe someday I'll use this if i remarry in the future : ) I love how in-depth you were with each ten tips!

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    1. Thank you! I'm glad you found the tips useful and hope they help when/If you decide to remarry

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  21. Best wishes on your upcoming wedding! Indeed it is stressful to plan for the big day, and I love your tips. I wish I knew about them years ago, especially about the guests. I should have put it in mind that the wedding is about me, not about them.

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    1. Thank you! Yes it's so easy to worry about judgement but after all... it's our day! My day. My say! In the nicest possible way

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  22. Our 8th anniversary is in June so I understand all that goes into planning a wedding. I agree with all of these for people to remember when planning a wedding.

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    1. Happy anniversary for June! I'm sure all of the stress and blips will be worth it when we're celebrating our 8th anniversary like you

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  23. My boyfriend's sister is getting married soon so I'll make sure to pass this one on. I know when my big day comes I'll be a hot mess, but at the end of the day, it's a celebration. Yeah things will go wrong, but your families are there to celebrate you two and that's the most important part 😁

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    1. You're so right! It's important to take a step back and remember why we're getting married! Good luck to your sister

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  24. Congratulations on the upcoming wedding. I know how stressful planning one can be but I love the positivity in your post about not stressing about it.

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    1. Thank you! Stressing was getting me no where. Positivity can be a huge motivation

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  25. I hear from my friends how much work is involved in planning a wedding and how stressful it can get. But in the end they had lots of fun at their parties :)

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    1. It's so underestimated. We worry about the smallest of things that really make no major difference to the big day!

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  26. Congratulations on your marriage! Oh Geeze I didn't imagine planning can take this much to be honest haha! No 5 is so so true!! I always said it... the guests should be the people that are a part of your life and not people that you have no idea who they are lol.

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  27. What a great post, what a shame I couldn't read it before my own wedding in 2013...
    Congratulations!

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